Your child is using AI. Whether you set it up or they found it themselves, the conversation is already happening. The question isn't whether to allow it — it's how to understand what your child is getting from it and whether it's replacing things they need from you and from the real world.
What kids use AI for
Homework help is just the surface. Children use AI for emotional support, creative exploration, social practice, and — increasingly — companionship. The AI is patient, never busy, and always available. For a child who feels unheard or overwhelmed, this can be powerfully attractive.
Warning signs
Notice if your child prefers AI to friends, becomes secretive about AI conversations, shows declining interest in activities they used to enjoy, or becomes anxious when AI access is limited. These aren't definitive signs of a problem, but they're worth a conversation.
The parent's role
You don't need to understand every AI tool your child uses. You need to understand what needs it's meeting. Ask open questions: "What do you like about talking to AI?" "What does it help you with?" The goal isn't surveillance — it's understanding. Your child's relationship with AI will be shaped by whether you approach it with curiosity or fear.